My shoes which I bought last week on the internet is the most important thing for me. The reason why I adore it is of course because of its look. Its color is mint - the color mixed with green and blue- so it goes really well with the weather of spring where there are fresh air and blue sky with full of sun shine. In other words, it reminds me the beauty of spring so that it makes me feel so good whenever I wear it. When it comes to its shape, it's stitched with white thread along the border and there's also a ribbon in the middle. These shoes are made in Japan where there are so many girls small in stature, so I think that's why it's designed to be so girlish and cute. Whenever I wear it, it catches the eyes of people that they can't help giving some compliments on my shoes and those compliments just make my day more joyful. That's why I like this shoes the most.
Hi, I'm Jean Park and it's great to have a watch your writing. What I liked about this writing is that you explained the details of your shoes very well. The color, shape and where it's made, I could see that how you tried hard to describe your new shoes. I think it was appropriate writing for this week's class which was writing specific. Although it feels like the whole paragraph is a bit short. Also it would have been better if you described your feelings more towards your shoes. Other than that, it was great!
ReplyDeleteThis is YoungHoon Kim. You did a good job on describing your precious possession, shoes. When I read your writing, I can imagine what it looks like. I hope you to change a word that is repeated in one sentence. It would be better to use synonym of compiliment to avoid repeating. Anyway it was a great piece of writing.
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