To talk about my life, singing has been a part of it all along. My mom said I had my individual favorite singer when I was 4 years old. When that singer's song came out from somewhere, I'd dance and sing along(I guess it would have been a murmur or a hum). When I was 4th grade in elemetry school, I took part in a local station's chorus. Alltogether making a harmony was a magical time for me. I sometimes attended a singing contest in ensemble and also on solo. My highschool days were full of singing activities too. I entered a school chorus club, once again savoured the magical moment when the voices combine in tune. Entering university, I tried somewhat different kind of singing. It was a musical, combined with actings and movements. I couldn't say I was content with what I did, but it was an exciting experience. Without the singing part, my life would have been less interesting for me.
To Kyoung-min KIM
ReplyDeleteFrom Jung-In SIM
As I'm the one who watched the musical that you performed last year, now I can understand how come you love to sing by reading this writing. Your main point seems to be about how much you've liked music for your life and also about what you did for it.
There are particular words which struck me as powerful - My highschool days were full of singing activities. The reason why I like this line is that this simple line just explains how much you dedicate yourself to music.
But I want your writing to tell me other things too about your life as you give the title 'on my life' because whether it's interesting or not, still they are also part of your life.
My name is Han Byol Kim.
ReplyDeleteThis is an interesting piece of writing of your dedication to singing. I could see your passion in singing. The lines that struct me were lines you mentioned your childhood. You must had been a child who liked music and singing a lot! However, I could find some grammatical error and lines I could not understand clearly. For example, 'Alltogether making a harmory~~'. It would be a better piece of wrting if you fix errors like this.
To Kyung-min Kim
ReplyDeleteFrom Da-hyun Yang
What I like about this piece of writing is the unity.
Throughout the paragraph, you wrote about how much you love singing. So I could easily understand how much you love singing. Your main point seems to be your favorite activity 'singing'.
There are two particular lines which struck me as powerful. First one is 'My mom said I had my individual favorite singer when I was 4 years old.'. This is because I was little bit surprised that only a 4-year-old girl had an favorite singer.(in a good way)
Next one is 'Without the singing part, my life would have been less interesting for me.'. From this line I could sincerely know how much you love singing.
However, the line 'I couldn't say I was content with what I did' makes me a bit confused. I thought you really like singing, but I just got curious why that kind of music experience couldn't make you content with what you did.
The only change I want is that I want to know other things like what you hate, and so on. I enjoyed your writing. Thank you.
2ND DRAFT On my life until now.
ReplyDeleteI had a happy, comfy childhood. I enjoyed drawing, singing and tasting my mom's food. I also had an opportunity to go abroad. When I was in 8th grade in elementary school, my family went to the US, Ohio. My sister and I often went to the pool next to our house, and also spent time at our neighbor's. Time seemed to go so slow then. Nothing had to be in a rush. After a year, we came back to Korea and continued my elementary school days. I did some extra-curricular activities such as singing in a school quartet, and playing French-horn in a school brass band. Unlike those days, I remember my middle school by school exams, and going to academies. But that doesn't mean that I felt unhappy then as my parents encouraged me to study, and my grades weren't so depressing. Going on 17, I entered a high school in Seoul, so I had to live in a dorm, apart from my family. Unlike the past, lots of choices had to be made on my own. I took part in part in a school chorus club, spent much time and effort on it. It became my joy. It was a time when I should be studying more than doing anything else, but I did the quite opposite. After taking my university enterance exam, I decided to study a year more for the exam. I felt regretful and guilty that I didn't do my best on studying when I was supposed to. Few joys were allowed during the preparation. I thought about only one thing in life, the exam. To think back about it now, my life has gone from the extreme to another. Now, I'm in the university, trying to keep to the middle way. I try to respect my interests in music by participating in a musical as a singer, or listening to music when I want to, and at the same time I try to study which is the primary work I should be doing as a university student.