The House I Liked the Most
Since I was a little girl, I moved a lot because of my father's job. When I was five, I went to Lima, Peru. Then I lived in a neighborhood called Camacho. And since rental fees are much more cheaper than Korea, we could afford a big house there. I liked the flat we lived then, especially my parent's room. If you enter my parent's room, you could feel the soft feeling since the whole flat except the kitchen and the bathrooms were covered with carpet. There are three closets on the left wall. In the right, there are two doors. One is for the bathroom. In this bathroom I imagined I was rich because it has such atmosphere. It is covered with ivory tiles and had two sinks. In the right there is an enourmous Jacuzzi. If you press the button, it would make bubbles. Then in the front there is a toilet and a shower. There were glass doors for each of them. It was an enourmous bathroom, actually it's bigger than my current room. If you talk it would echo. The bathroom always smelled a little wet with the scent of Pantene shampoo. Then, there is the dress room. This was my favorite room. Whenever my mom leftt the house I would discover all kinds of stuff in her dress room. It smlled a little dusty because of the fur coats.
Hello, this is Park Tae Jun and I enjoyed reading your writing. Your description was very specific and interesting because it's something that no one else may describe. As reading your writing, I felt that I was guided by you to look around the house; your description was that specific that I could draw an image of what you were describing. It could've been much better description if you could say something about color.
ReplyDeleteTo chin ha kyung
ReplyDeleteFrom Da-hyun Yang
It was really interesting to read your paragraph. I just thought that I would like to live there,too. What I like most is the beginning of your paragraph. You did not just start with describing your favorite place but telling us the story of how you get there. Also all senses are well described. However, I think it would be better if you wrote the reason why you like the dress room most. And I feel like your paragraph is not ended because of the last sentence. Thus it would be better if you end your paragraph with more conclusive sentences.
My favorite place was a Bathroom
ReplyDeleteSince I was a little girl, I moved a lot because of my father's job. When I was five, I went to Lima, Peru. Then I lived in a neighborhood called Camacho. And since rental fees are much more cheaper than Korea, we could afford a big house there. I liked the flat we lived then, especially the bathroom in my parent's room. If you enter my parent's room, you could feel the soft feeling since the whole flat except the kitchen and the bathrooms were covered with carpet. In the right, there are two doors. The first one is for the bathroom. In this bathroom I imagined I was rich because it has such an atmosphere. The walls and the floor are covered with ivory tiles. Turning to the left, you can see two sinks. In the right there is an enourmous Jacuzzi. If you press the button, it would make bubbles in the tub. Then at the front there is a toilet and a shower. The shower is at the left side and the toilet at the right. There are opaque glass doors for each of them. It was an enourmous bathroom, actually it's bigger than my current room. If you talk it would echo. The bathroom always smelled a little wet with the scent of Pantene shampoo. I really miss this bathroom since I spent a lot of time there and I wish I had one like this one.